Posts by Aysha Griffin

What Should I Wear?

May 11, 2020 2 Comments Changing The World, Health & Fitness, Passion & Joy

What Should I Wear? (and life’s other big questions )

NOTE TO INHABIT YOUR DREAMS READERS: Greetings from Catalunya! Before beginning this blog post, I want to explain what happened about a week ago. This website mysteriously disappeared. My trusted web manager, Margie Baxley of Geek Websites, was able to restore it from backup. That auto-generated a mailing and you received an old blog post from me (and IggyMo), written about Girona’s annual Temps de Flors event almost a year ago. Unfortunately, like so much that was, the event was canceled this year due to Covid-19 and the general lockdown in Spain, in its 9th week as of this writing. I apologise for any confusion and hope you enjoy this light-hearted piece I wrote a while back but hadn’t yet published. I welcome your comments and look forward to hearing from you! With love, Aysha

I love textiles… textures, colors, patterns, and clothing styles from many cultures and eras. Lucky for me, I also love second-hand stores and charity shops, so I can indulge in occasional “shopping therapy,” usually without spending more than a lunch out, and easily acquire and give away whole wardrobes. But acquiring clothes isn’t the problem.

I’ve had plenty of clothes in my life, as I’m guessing you have too.

I once lived in the same house for 10 years and collected all manner of clothing and accessories to fill a glorious walk-through closet, the size of a small bedroom. It had built-in closet organizers — bars of varying heights, drawers, shelves, places for scarfs and pendants, belts, bags, shoes, even hats! I was so organized that I even used hangars of the same size and color so it looked uniformly fabulous. And this before Marie Kondo was out of diapers. So, organization was not the problem.

But some mornings, nay most mornings, I’d stand naked amid all these marvelously organized pieces of colorful cloth, and stare in total bewilderment… often for an embarrassing and disconcertingly long time.

Now, stating the obvious: to have this “problem” of what to wear is a sign of great privilege, worthy of appreciation and not to be taken too seriously, lest we forget that underneath this game of dress-up, we are all naked apes.

This reality check aside, for those of us with closets full of colors, patterns, textures and styles of dresses, skirts, pants, shorts, shirts, blouses, sweaters, jackets, from casual to formal and season specific, plus undergarments and all manner of accessories, the perennial and often overwhelming challenge, is not only, “What should I wear?” but
What can I wear?
What fits?
What looks good on me?

And what matches the fabulous hand-embroidered bellbottoms from Mexico I’ve never worn?

Being unable to quickly and easily answer these questions-to-self wastes a lot of time and psychic energy, and can even evoke emotions of despair and self-loathing.

Is there not some madness in this dilemma? And does it not speak to the ways we may have so complicated our lives that making clear and simple decisions becomes a source of anxiety rather than joy?

Eight years ago I embarked on an uncharted journey into an uncertain future, with no known closets. I divested myself of all possessions except what would fit into three suitcases (two large, one carry-on). Saying goodbye to nearly everything and everyone was like a conscious death, and the well-worn maxim, “You can’t take it with you,” played a mournful but strangely liberating refrain.

In deciding which clothes, shoes and accessories to bring, I realized the answer to “what to wear?” lay in coordinated outfits.

The significance of clothing

But before getting into details of applying “coordinating principles” to your wardrobe, let’s consider the scope of the significance of clothing. The story of humanity can be tracked by its story. From grasses and fronds to animal skins and furs; from the discovery of silk and dyes to the cultivation of animals, cotton and fibers; from the invention of needles-and-thread to looms, the cotton gin, mechanized production, synthetics and an online global marketplace. The fabrics with which we cloth our bodies connect us both to history, and to our present, complex world.

I’d like to continue musing about our relationship to clothing:
Why is what you wear important?
How can you have a healthy, happy relationship with your wardrobe, and everything you own?

But first, here are three essential principles you must understand for choosing clothing and coordinating outfits that look and feel great.

Essential principles

Your body type. There are four basic body types or shapes. It’s obvious which you are, and knowing this helps make choices about what styles of clothes generally look best on your type. No body type is better or worse than another; it’s simply about accentuating your best attributes and minimizing your less-than-best to create a balanced — and more attractive — look. For a basic understanding of body types and the best styles of clothing for each, click here.– Apple: (triangle downward) broader shoulders and bust, and narrower hips
– Pear: (triangle upward) hip measurements are greater than bust measurements
– Banana: (straight/rectangular) waist measurement is less than 9 inches smaller than the hip or bust measurement.
– Hour glass: (triangles opposing, facing in) hip and bust are almost of equal size, with a narrow waist.

This pear-shaped author’s note to Apple and Pear-shaped bodies: “skinny leg” pants are for skinny legs attached to skinny butts and waists. Also, if you are not tall, thin and fit, please don’t wear leggings without a top that comes to at least the middle of your thighs. If you have a waistline worth showing off, add a belt.

Your personal style. Whether you know it or not, you already have a style. Of course, you can choose to change it, and often, as we age and/or our lifestyle changes, so does our style. There are many websites that explain this and offer quizzes and tips. Here’s one. This site also has sections on discovering your colors and building your wardrobe.
Your best colors. Just because you like a color, or it’s what’s being pushed this season, does not mean it looks good with your skin tone and hair color, or that the cut is in your style. For example, last year’s summer yellows and winter grays were “the worst” for this olive-skinned-gold-jewelry-wearing woman. To learn more about what colors combine well, check out this site and see her Pinterest illustration.

Once you know what styles and colors work best with your body type, personality and lifestyle, it’s a lot easier to create outfits that take the mystery out of “What should I wear?”

Your Clothes Want To “Speak to You”

We tend to think about objects in our home as “just things,” but consider this: You chose each item, brought it home, gave it a place to live, are responsible for it and, in essence, are in relationship with it. So, what if you approached these things as if sentient beings, like a dog or cat, or even a friend?

Most fashion consultants use a standard objective approach to decluttering and organising a wardrobe with criteria like: if you haven’t worn it in a year, or it doesn’t fit now, or if it needs repairs, etc. This is not “wrong,” but it is solely cerebral, devoid of emotion, and takes no account of the relationship we have with our things. If they didn’t matter, they wouldn’t be in our life… and indeed, many things hold little appreciation by us and are best to bid “adios.”

When you stand in the closet asking, “What should I wear?” do you listen for a reply? Seriously, I believe our clothes want to “speak” us. But, as with any relationship, we must spend time with them, touch them, hold them up and look at them.

You can ask them intelligent questions and listen open-heartedly to their answer. “Do you really like being on my body?” “Do you want to spend the whole day with me?” “Do you want to attend my business meeting… or walk around the lake, or my trip to the grocery store or to Rome?”

I’ve had clothes tell me, “I’m not comfortable on you.” “I fit you perfectly, but you obviously don’t like red pants.” “I know you haven’t worn me yet, but you bought me for a special occasion and I’d like to hang around longer and hope that occasion arises.”

Every day, once or more, we have this great luxury to decide which costume to don to reflect our sense of self… to our self (that beloved image in the mirror) and to the world in which we interact.

A closet full of clothes without outfits…
is like a scavenger hunt without clues!

Ignoring the ever-shifting tides of fashion, I care about dressing comfortably in my colours and style, which could be call “Bohemian chic.” As a woman of a certain age, I’ve learned that now, more than ever, my daily “costumes” — whether at home or out-and-about — play huge role in how I feel. They are part of the theatre of my life.

I’ve been giving a lot of thought to the theatre of our lives, especially since entering my “Third Act,” (you can read about the new focus of my work), but most poignant is that as long as we are alive we are always on stage… scripting, designing, directing, producing and starring in this unique improvisational show.

The challenge of having a closet full of clothes and “nothing to wear” is not a lack of imagination. It’s a lack of curation.

The challenge of having a closet full of clothes and “nothing to wear”, or wearing the same clothes again and again, is not a lack of imagination. It’s a lack of curation, defined as “the action or process of selecting, organizing, and looking after the items in a collection or exhibition.” To wisely curate a collection, we must know what it’s about — the theme, the focus and the messages and emotions we hope to convey, to ourselves and whomever we encounter.

Curating our wardrobe is part of curating every aspect of our lives — from the food we buy and how we prepare it, to the way we arrange and decorate our spaces, to the information, people and activities to which we choose to give our time, attention and care. (Related to this subject, I recommend this free eBook by Jan H. Croteau, Hanging With Art: Make Every Room Extraordinary).

Ultimately, the question, “What should I wear?”, also begs the bigger life questions of self-identity and definition, like,
“What do I love?”
“What do I value?”
“What gives me joy?”

Although each of us must answer these questions for herself, not everyone has the time, interest or confidence to design and coordinate their wardrobe, living spaces, or healthy regimes; ergo the demand for services of designers, consultants and coaches who can help curate what we have to work with, maximising and exhibiting it to its personal and public best.

If you’ve read this far…

Thank you. I’ve covered a lot of ground here. It seems no matter what challenges we have — from the seemingly mundane, like how you dress, to more pressing matters like health, relationships, money — they all offer opportunities for greater self-knowing, and the satisfying expression of our most kind and compassionate selves.

I’d love if you’d leave a comment, even if just to let me know you’ve spent time with me here.

May I help?

If you’d like me to write more about any of the aspects covered in this article, email me or mention in a comment. If I may offer any help to you or a friend, contact me to schedule a free 30-minute coaching conversation. I’d love to hear from you!

“Aysha Griffin is a much-acclaimed coach who can help you to grow a business, start or complete a creative project, get a handle on your finances or, yes, curate your wardrobe. And to make it fun, you can do it via live video connection.” — Judith Fein

Flower Time in Girona- Guest Blog by IggyMo

June 7, 2019 6 Comments Spain, Travel

I spent the winter hanging out at home, reading and absorbing some of the most important lessons about life and art. On the first day of spring I realized I’d become a bit of an art critic and there was no better place to exercise my new-found skill than Girona… when the whole city becomes an art installation called the Temps de Flors (Flower Time).

Iggymo, the little prince — *Reading my favorite book on a cool, rainy day.*

Temps de Flors sign near my house. See the plane trees of the park where I live?Every May, for the past 64 years, the City of Girona holds a party for art made from a gazillion flowers, and you know I love a party. It is a time of year when everyone has the opportunity to be an artist. From conception to realization, Sir IggyMo, Art Critic at Large, got to see how deftly the artists designed and arranged their exhibits. It had been a long time since I saw my girl so camera happy.

Temps de Flors, Girona — *Plaza (or Plaça) de la Independencia, a favorite place for sidewalk cafes and events*

We saw marvelous things, like…

… a Medieval wall of blue jeans sprouting flowers and a courtyard transformed into a fantastical underwater scene.

And then there was the tower (Torre Gironella), which My Girl says has a creepy history. She told me that in 1391 hundreds of men, women and children were starved to death in this tower, because they were Jewish. The story involves the Black Plague, which was claiming millions of lives all over Europe and no one knew what caused it. They were scared and wanted to blame something or someone. Like always, the easiest blame-targets are the ones different from us, the ones we don’t understand. In Spain at that time this was the Jews, and a major pogrom, or killing spree, spread across the country from Sevilla to Girona, killing thousands of people.

But, from my art critic perspective, during Temps de Flors the gloomy interior of Torre Gironella is transformed into a magical cave of flowers and sculptures. They do not erase the tragic story but bringing life and beauty to the space.

One room had a golden Buddha surrounded by flowers. On the wall a video played of Mahatma Gandhi’s peaceful marches for Indian independence from Britain. My Girl explained this is a model for the Catalan people’s commitment to peace and independence from Spain. I would not have known that as I was just appreciating the floral arrangements and colors.

St Feliu Girona church — *Girona church of St. Felix, St Feliu of the flies*

A My favorite installation was the forest of trees made of hemp and flowers on the 89 steps of the Girona Cathedral. (It is said the cathedral was built on the ruins of a Temple to the goddess Juno, mother of Minerva… but My Girl will have to tell you about that).

I came upon this giant fly on the wall. Flies are a strange symbol of Girona. The story involves St. Feliu (Felix) releasing a lot of flies that sent an invading French army running back across the border. The myths, legends and secrets of Girona are as thick as the Roman walls that you can still walk 2,000 years later. Imagine that!

My Critic’s Choice Award goes to the magical forest of trees on the 89 steps of the Girona Cathedral.

We ended our adventure back at Plaza de Independencia with a violet and coconut cone at La Bombonera, our favorite all-natural gelato parlor. The nice people who make it actually serve it. And if the store isn’t busy they will tell you all about the flavors and let you taste them. As the art critic I’ve become, I can declare with certainty that each flavor is a work of art. Next time, says My Girl, rose petals and raspberry… or pistachio and dark chocolate… or…

And then we headed home, with me nestled among many happy memories in my black leather bag from Rome. I look up at the plane trees that frame our camino and think, what a lucky Sir IggyMo I am!

P.S.
The Temps de Flors catalog says there are 171 floral projects by 1,100 volunteers and 80 municipal workers, seen by an estimated crowd of 250,000 people, and (I add) made with millions and millions of flowers. Maybe next Flower Time you’ll be here?

Meanwhile, wherever you are, I send smiles and hugs and hope to hear from you about your adventures! (Please leave your comments below).

IggyMo is a traveling Classic Edition Gund monkey whose mission is to spread smiles and hugs. For more about his adventures, visit his Facebook page. His “My Girl’s” website is: AyshaGriffin.com and her blog for Travelers, Writers & Entrepreneurs can be enjoyed at: InhabitYourDreams.com

#incostabrava #inpyrenees #girona #spaintravel #Catalunya #tempsdeflors #GottaGetAGund #iggyMo #visitSpain #travel #traveltuesdays

Getting To Know Gaudí: La Pedrera

August 18, 2018 15 Comments Travel

You can’t set foot in Barcelona without being bombarded by GAUDÍ!

Sometimes referred to as “God’s architect,” Gaudí is big business for the tourist industry… but don’t let that deter you from experiencing his outrageous, mind-blowing creations. And even though Barcelona offers a multitude of compelling reasons to visit this beautiful progressive world-class city, Gaudí is reason enough.

The name Antoni Gaudí i Cornet (25 June 1852 – 10 June 1926) may mean little outside architectural circles or his native region of Catalonia in northeast Spain, but to discover the imagination and prolific works of this extraordinary artist is to forever change your understanding of art, architecture, nature, and the meaning of “visionary.”

I first encountered Gaudí in the 1980s when exploring mosaics, and it did not take long to become obsessed with the “modernista” movement of the art nouveau era of the late 19^th and early 20^th centuries, of which he was a prime influence. Decades before the ease of online research, I sought and devoured numerous books on his work, but it was not until 2006 I made my first pilgrimage to Barcelona to see them with my own eyes.

gaudi-casa mila — The strange shapes on the rooftop of Casa Mila/La Pedrera serve as ventilation shafts, skylights, stairwells and chimneys. Some are finished in the trencadis technique – mosaics using broken tiles, stones, marble and glass.

I’ve returned numerous times and most recently to meet an American friend who’d never visited Barcelona nor knew of Gaudí. I love to share what I know and love with the curious, so revisiting Gaudi’s work with Jina was a great pleasure.

Seven of his works in and around Barcelona have been designated UNESCO World Heritage Sites and are essential stops on the Gaudí trail: Parque Güell; Palacio (Palau) Güell; Casa Mila (La Pedrera); Casa Vicens; Gaudí’s work on the Nativity façade and Crypt of La Sagrada Familia; Casa Batlló; Crypt in Colonia Güell.

You can read about, see photos and videos online, plan your trip and buy advance tickets to skip the lines (!) at the links above. If you want to dive deeper, travel bloggers, The Independent Travel Cats, provide a more extensive list of 20 Gaudí sites and details on visiting them all.

La Pedrera / Casa Mila:
The Best Place To Begin Exploring Gaudí

Our first stop was Casa Mila, also known as La Pedrera. It’s located at Passeig de Gràcia, 92, just a short stroll north of Plaza Catalunya and diagonally across the street from Casa Batló. This makes it easy to visit both in one day, but you may want to savor each experience if you have the time, as there’s a lot of sensory stimuli to absorb.

Having visited most Gaudí sites – and been wowed by each – La Pedrera offers the most comprehensive foundation for understanding and experiencing Gaudí the man, his work and the times in which he created. You don’t have to be a student or aficionado of architecture or art to appreciate the original, sometimes wacky, amazing designs and use of materials that sprang from his imagination and implemented with an innovative and highly technical understanding of his mediums .

La Pedrera was commissioned by Pere Milà and his wife Roser Segimon who had bought the corner lot on this posh avenue in 1905 and wanted Gaudí to build a private home with apartments above to rent. With spectacular undulating organic design both inside and out, it still serves as apartments for some lucky inhabitants. The rest of us get to stroll through several floors of unique, marvelous, mind-bending architectural details while informed by an intelligent and insightful audio guide in the language of your choice (part of admission).

The rooftop terrace overlooking the entire city is its own fantasy world with walkways like gentle waves and sentinel-like towers, some actually functioning as vents, provoking the imagination with whimsy and awe.

On this sunny spring day, Jina and I made several passes and didn’t want to leave this magical (some say ‘divine’) playground. But there was yet the attic to explore with its fascinating exhibitions of Gaudí’s models, methods and inspirations from nature, constructed with 270 catenary arches made from brick and arranged to resemble the inside of the Biblical whale. Really, and this was the laundry room!

Although by now I was sated with Gaudí’s out-of-this-world ideas-made-real, the self-guided tour took us through a spacious multi-roomed apartment to reveal the building’s internal layout around the spectacular inner atrium/courtyard. It is completely furnished from the early 20^th century, down to clothing and toys, with ornamental elements all designed by Gaudí.

An audiovisual explains the rapid transformation and modernization of Barcelona in the first quarter of the 20^th century, putting in context the foundation of this exceptionally creative modern city where art and nature are nurtured, valued and accessible.

Finally – myself ready for a tapa and wine but Jina soldiering on – there is the Milá family apartment converted into a temporary exhibition space, with Gaudi’s stone pillars carved with ornamental motifs and inscriptions. And, of course, there is a gift shop with many unusual high-quality items that reflect the elegance of the “work of art” building and top-notch museum quality of its exhibitions.

According to a publication at the time of construction of La Pedrera (1906-1912), Gaudi was determined to meet the needs of modern life “without the nature of the materials or their resistance being an obstacle that limits his freedom of action”. Unsurprising is that the project was controversial, well over budget and violated city codes. Surprising is that it was built at all and remains one of the most imaginative and iconic residential structures in the world.

After four hours, as we exited the massive sculpted wooden doors with their modernista stained glass, I asked Jina what she thought. “Wow. All I can say is wow.”

So go online, book your ticket, and prepare to meet one of the greatest architectural geniuses of all time.

If you have any questions or comments about Gaudi’s work, visiting his sites, or Barcelona and Catalunya in general, I’d love to hear from you below.

Notes: As at many sites, your bags will be scanned upon entry. Backpacks, shopping bags, etc. can be checked in a self-service locker room. If you can travel light, all the better. Cameras without flash are permitted. There is not a cafeteria, although I think there are vending machines for bottled water; you can also carry your own. However, there is an adjacent upscale restaurant that looks to have a wonderful ambiance.

#incostabrava #inpyrenees #barcelona #gaudi #lapedrera #casamila #spaintourism

Mercerie High Street Food Converts This Non-Foodie

March 25, 2018 21 Comments Business & Work, Italy

Not a fan of “fine dining” restaurants, I have prided myself on being a “non-foodie,” annoyed by dishes described as if abstract art, the snotty attitudes of wait staff and the absurdly inflated prices for petite portions. But all my negativity dissolved recently in twice experiencing dinner at Mercerie “High Street Food,” a new slick, modern, trendy eatery in Rome, Italy that would, on the surface, imply all I distain.

Yes, it exudes hipness – a glass wall fronts the pedestrian street facing the ruins of ancient temples at Largo di Torre Argentina, (also a renowned cat sanctuary; cats considered messengers of the gods). The interior is sleek, with colorful cone-shaped padded stools and barrel chairs at a couple of cocktail tables near the door. A chest-high semi-circular corregated-steel bar, with a vast collection of fluted glasses suspended above, forms the focal point for stylish young black-suited professionals to lean against as the pleasant barman’s perpetual moves elevate drink-making to performance art.

Flat screens cycle artistic photos of signature “tapa-like” dishes served on elongated tryptic plates in white porcelain, intended as finger food, ergo the “street food” reference; definitely “high street.” Subtle lighting and perfectly modulated classic jazz and folk music by original artists round out the ambiance, which extends into the “intimate” dining room, where more substantiial menu items are served with with stainless and gold-tipped flatware. Even the kitchen’s frosted glass motion-sensor sliding door exemplifies attention to every cohesive modern detail.

It’s a perfect construct for inflated prices and foo-foo food. But here’s the difference: The food combinations and presentations really are imaginative and delicious, prices are reasonable, the ambiance is relaxing, and the wait staff is friendly, unpretentious, enthusiastic, knowledgeable and multi-lingual.

Igles Corelli and Aysha Griffin — Igles Corelli and a new “Foodie” convert

This combination of ostensibly hip and genuinely welcoming and worthwhile is due to the vision, expertise and personality behind Mercerie, chef Igles Corelli. Although I’d been told on my first visit that the chef was “Michelin-starred,” that meant nothing to me until my second visit when a smiling, bespectacled man gracious opened the front door. “Benvenuto! Welcome!” Signore Corelli himself.

To watch this man move about his latest creation, shaking hands with guests and speaking encouragingly to his staff between moments of relaxation over a drink with a friend, is to witness a relaxed, confident and good manager; a businessman and culinary artist enjoying the fruits of his labor.

Corelli lives up to his reputation not only as a top Italian chef, whose other restaurants have garnered awards and high praise, but as a dedicated teacher. Through professional associations and tutelage at his restaurants, his lifetime in the world of Italian cuisine – his parents owned a trattoria where he started working at age 9 – has influenced the success of a generation of chefs and pioneered nouvelle Italian cuisine.

While the little plates of innovative concoctions (starting at 7€) delight the senses, the generous salads of mixed greens with nuts, seeds, and thin slices of fruit and veggies with a subtly tangy house dressing (10€) are the best I’ve found in Rome.

As I began eating my salad, Corelli came to the table and handed me a gold-plated salad pincher, explaining it is a prototype he plans to add to the unique offerings at Mercerie. Imprinted in the round tip is the Buddhist Soka Gakkai chant, “Nam-myoho-renge-kyo.” “It’s for happiness and peace!” effused Corelli’s charming partner, Helga Buscaroli. Apparently, Corelli had a dream about them.

Richard H. Seager, my Buddhist scholar companion who’d written a definitive book on the sect, “Encountering the Dharma: Daisaku Ikeda, Soka Gakkai, and the Globalization of Buddhist Humanism,” would have been happy to explain more about the chant, which means something akin to “Hail to the glorious Dharma.” But either their English was too limited or the simple idea of happiness and peace was sufficient knowledge.

In any case, Corelli is obviously innovating continuously and with the intention of delighting diners with both sensational food and ambiance.

Rome seems the perfect place for conversions, and Mercerie convinced me that “fine dining” may actually be an experience worth pursuing. My foodie friends will be happy to hear I’ve seen the light.

Mercerie High Street Food is located at Via San Nicola De’ Cesarini 4/5, 00186 Roma, Italia. Reservations recommended by phoning +39 340 997 2996, at their Facebook page or @Merceriehighstreetfood. You can read more about Chef Corelli here.

Bicycling in Rome

June 14, 2017 7 Comments Health & Fitness, Italy, Travel

Common sense dictates that – with Italian drivers owning the reputation as the most aggressive in the world, coupled with poorly maintained roads, baffling traffic signals, millions of visitors milling about and no bike lanes or paths – bike riding in Rome is a ridiculous and dangerous undertaking.

This is true. And there is a group of dedicated bicyclists and safe-access advocates who challenge this monthly. At each full moon, hundreds of bicyclists of all ages meet at Piazza del Popolo around 8:30 p.m. and ride through the city together.

bicycle Rome — *Monthly full moon bicycle ride through the streets of Rome.*

You can rent a bike earlier in the day, as I did, and join them for a beautiful way to see Rome at night. It’s free and a remarkable experience of community spirit. It is also an act of civil disobedience.

Some of the veteran riders use their body and bike to block traffic at major intersections for the stream of bicyclers to pass. Car and bus drivers honk angrily as they wait, and aggressive motorcyclists roar ahead at any opening. “It’s dangerous to be a blocker,” explained my friend Giussepe Teano, an avid Roman bicycler, “but important.”

There are 27 associations, foundations and other organizations in Rome that have organized around issues of mobility and safety for pedestrians and bicyclists, according to an interview I read online with Alfredo Giordani, a 53-year-old pubic servant turned activist. When his good friend was killed in 2011 while riding a bike, Giordani devoted himself to this cause of safety and access on the streets of Rome. (#VIVINSTRADA ROMA)

bicycling Rome — *Pedalata di Luna Pierna, taking over the streets of Rome*

In typical Italian bureaucratic style, the city administration requires individuals to participate in proposals for change via associations, organizations and institutions. All of these groups have been bringing attention and advocating to address “serious urban problems” like the conflict of roads and public spaces for bicyclists, pedestrians and those with limited mobility.

Giordani and others have proposed a number of solutions to transform Rome in a bike-friendly city and will propose them again at the next municipal budget of October – November 2017. “We have a program that could significantly transform the life of our city,” he says.

But, really, what are the chances for change now in a city where motor vehicles rule, laws are so convoluted that no one understands them, and national elections and unemployment are more on people’s minds than bicycle safety?

“Nobody can say if this will be a good time to take the human aspect to the streets of the capital. But there has been a great effort by so many, and this leads me to a moderate optimism,” concludes Giordani.

Personally, I am not optimistic and remain amazed that anything functions in Rome, or any major city in the world. Rome, with the friendliest population I’ve found, is a great walking city, supported by good tram and bus service and several metro lines (you can’t dig too deep or in many places, as history is buried everywhere!).

When it comes to bicycling urban streets, Amsterdam and Paris are two cities I’ve enjoyed renting bikes. Rome, not at all.

But if you find yourself in Rome on a full moon night, get yourself a bike and join in the Pedalata di Luna Piena. You may be rewarded with such a breathtaking moment as this:

full oon over the Colosseum, bicycling Rome — *Full moon over the Colosseum, Rome (June 2017)*

The Best Hairstylist in Rome

April 1, 2017 7 Comments Italy, Passion & Joy, Relationships, Travel

Call me shallow, but after two weeks in Rome, my favorite discoveries have been the best hairdresser in the world, the best artichokes, the best gelato store, the best shoe store for my size 10 (Euro 41) shoes, and the best new friends.

Like countless tourists before me, I’ve been to the Vatican Museum, the Borghese Gallery, the Pantheon, Spanish Steps, Trevi Fountain, piazzas galore, and at least 5 major churches, including the Mother of them all, St. Paul’s Basilica, overcome by the gob-smacking architecture, art and craftsmanship that adorns them.

I’ve loitered at street-side cafes all over the city, peered through the keyhole on Aventine Hill and into the Mouth of Truth on display near Circus Maximus. I’ve strolled through the Jewish ghetto and synagogue, eaten plates of pasta, baskets of bread-based sweets, over-cooked greens, and enjoyed many cups of strong caffé and glasses of pleasant vino rosso. But nothing is more exciting to me than the personal encounters, the stories of the choices and challenges in the lives of amazing people I encounter… and almost all my encounters are with amazing people.

Rome best hair dresser — Stefano and his friend Patrizio on the street leading to “TAZ,” the “Temporary Autonomous Zone” where Stefan works on just a few clients a day – so as to give them his full attention – and plans to soon sell “the most-excellent products for hair and skin.” Note that in Italy, friendships between straight men (as is the case here) are far more physical than in other countries I’ve visited.

“With every action we add or subtract to the goodness in the world.” So says Stefano Sillavi, as he gently brushes my hair, tangled and stiff from too much product in my perennial battle to make my curls look other than they naturally want to.

Have you ever had your head touched for an hour or more in a gentle way, as if the other’s fingers are sensing every centimeter of its shape and the texture and flow of each hair? I hadn’t, and it is a remarkable experience.

In a small shop in Trastevere, with an unassuming sign reading “TAZ,” I sit in front of a large framed oval mirror, crystal chandeliers hanging from the high plastered ceiling, as Stefan explains the nature of my hair and “what it wants to do.” He enthuses about its waves and flows how he will shape it, and why.

OK? Oh yes!

No one has ever taken the time to know my hair in this way, and then spoken about it with such knowledge and insight.

We move to the basin where he washes and conditions, continuing the constant hands-on movement of a skilled practitioner. Back to the mirror, he clips and snips and fluffs and dries, adding only a little oil to the hair itself.

Rome best hairstylist — *Stefan Sillavi shaving his friend Patrizio who stops in for a visit.*

We talk about consciousness and the practice of being present, and his work, to which he is devoted. He speaks with gratitude for a Japanese woman mentor he had in New York, where he studied and worked for seven years. His command of English, and philosophical bent, makes possible the depth of conversation we share.

At the end of two hours of having my head touched with such care, my hair shaped and fluffed, I felt I’d had a long, luxurious massage.

Touching and caressing the head is a sensuous and intimate action, which is perhaps why it is so seemingly rare. And unlike my countless previous haircuts – from a cheapo $8 SuperCuts to a $140 Vidal Sassoon cut in New York City – I’d never before left a salon feeling truly enamored of my hair and renewed, more confident, and more beautiful than ever.

I can say Stefano Sillavi is the best hairstylist in Rome, but he may be the best in the world!

Aysha Griffin with Stefan Cillavi, hair stylist Rome. — *Stefano Sillavi and Yours Truly at TAZ… after a fabulous experience.*

If you are planning a trip to Rome, or are in Rome, you can contact Stefan by phone or WhatsApp at: +39 388.759.7166. I will not quote his fee but it is very reasonable… even for just a haircut, which, as I’ve described, this is much more than simply that. He works his magic on men as well as women.

Have you ever had an extraordinary haircut experience? Please share in comments. I’ll write about my other “best finds” soon.

Vatican Museum

March 26, 2017 4 Comments Italy, Travel

Vatican Museum entry sculpture — *Sculpture above the entry to the Vatican Museum; although a new, slick pavilion to the north has been added for processing the hoards of visitors.*

It’s too big and too crowded… and you must go. Of course, this is The Vatican, the seat of the predominant religion and government of the western world for centuries, Michelangelo’s dome of St. Peter’s Basilica dominates the skyline and, well, it houses some of the greatest art ever created.

St. Peters domeby Michelangelo — *St. Peters dome designed by Michelangelo, taking clues from the Pantheon built 1,500 years before.*

To skip the lines that wind for at least half a mile around the massive western and northern walls (and this is in mid-March… imagine summer!), your best bet is to sign up for a small tour. With some 5,000 official guides registered with the Vatican Museums, we felt fortunate to have randomly chosen Christiana Tittarelli, a charming Italian art historian with a good command of English and years of experience. Her insightful narrative was transmitted into our earbuds wirelessly, so even when slightly separated from the group of seven, we could hear her clearly.

Vatican Museum entry — *We were told 20,000 people a day visit the Vatican Museum. Book a tour in advance!*

Once fitted with headphones and tickets, the tour begins in the lemon garden and winds through room after room of magnificent architecture and art – collected, donated or stolen – to its end in the Sistine Chapel, where photos are not allowed and “Silencio!” is repeated to the crowd who cannot help whispering and talking about what they’re noticing in the 12 wall frescoes (by Botticelli, Ghirlandalo, etc., including Michelangelo’s creepy “Last Judgment”) and the 33 ceiling panels.

Even three exhausting hours of moving through the galleries (with throngs of others) does not begin to scratch the surface of the buildings and treasures of Vatican City.

Classical sculptures in Vatican Museum — *Classical sculptures informed much of later work, specifically the Renaissance masters.*

This ancient Greek torso is said to be Michelangelo’s inspiration for God’s body as he reaches out to Adam in the Sistine Chapel’s center ceiling panel. God also has his entourage and arm around a young girl, while Adam reclines seemingly indifferent to God’s extended reach.

Gold and more gold, this in the ceiling of the Gallery of the Candelabras… I think, but there were so many rooms, so much to take in.

And then there was a long hall of enormous and stunning tapestries.

Vatican tapestry of the resurrection — A small segment of a tapestry I estimate to be 10 feet tall and 20 feet wide. Notice the almost whimsical presentation by the angel; a “ta-dah! He is risen!” and the bewildered look on the face of Christ.

There were the Rafael rooms, with his prolific big-scale paintings of life as he imagined it in the time of Christ; himself only living to age 39. The story goes that his funeral was attended by more women than men and most were presumed to have known him in the “Biblical sense.” We passed through the Borges’ opulent apartment; a pope so depraved that no future pope would inhabit his chambers. And finally, (although I am skipping many amazing bits), an area of a modern art collection that was started in the 1990s and seems like filler for empty rooms before heading through passageways to the grand finale of the Sistine Chapel.

The tour ended at St. Peter’s Square. The Basilica, open to the public, proved too much for aching feet and minds reeling with art and history overload, so I peeked inside and vowed, “Another day.”

Wandering Trastevere

March 25, 2017 8 Comments Italy, Travel

*Piazza Santa Maria Trastevere where strolling crowds are entertained by musicians and street performers.*

Pedestrian alleyways lined with trattorias, osterias, ristorantes, enotecas (wine bars), gelaterias and shops of all kinds intersect at odd angles, punctuated by piazzas offering a few tables and chairs in front of a small bar, great for people watching. This is Trastevere, across the Tiber and south of Vatican City, considered one of the oldest and most-colorful neighborhoods in Rome.

Tiber at night — *Crossing the Tiber River at night (St. Paul’s Cathedral in the distance) from Centro Historico to Trastevere, the oldest settlement on the west bank and accessed by 7 bridges over the Tiber.*

In the evening, Romans, used to standing for coffee, (it’s cheaper than if you sit down), gather in front of establishments with drinks in hand. There seem to be no laws against drinking in public. The conversation and friendships among groups of men are markedly more affectionate and animated than I’ve witnessed elsewhere.

The mealtime and drink rituals here go something like this: morning coffee and a croissant, mid-morning coffee, lunch followed by coffee, mid-afternoon coffee, aperitivo (happy hour after work that can be a good deal, including a buffet of tapas and a drink for 8-10€), followed by dinner (3 to 4 courses), wine and a coffee.

Coffee means a shot of espresso, with cappuccino acceptable for the first cup of the day but considered déclassé after 10 a.m. as the belief is that coffee aids in digestion and milk obstructs digestion. As a tourist, your request for an afternoon latté will be tolerated, albeit with a rolling of the eyes or a snicker.

*Some Trastevere restaurants display food to entice diners*.

*Fun servers at Trastevere sidewalk cafe.*

Like all wonderful places that get “discovered” and popularized, many locals lament the gentrification, hip nightclubs, high-end restaurants and hoards of ambling tourists that have supplanted the daily life of this once more-earthy and working-class neighborhood. Of course, not knowing it in the past, I find its Medieval cobblestone streets and piazzas lined with sidewalk cafes and filled with friendly crowds and polished performers to be charming. And, for a step back in time you can always duck in to one of the many churches, the most famous being Santa Maria in Trastevere, the first official Christian place of worship, founded in the third century, and devoted to the worship of the Virgin Mary. There is much that could be said – and no doubt has been – about the roles and perception of women by the Roman Catholic Church, but I’ll leave that for another time and instead share some photos from my strolls in Trastevere.

Tabaccheria Trastevere — *Tabaccheria, or tobacco shop, is the place to buy transportation tickets, candies, office supplies, postcards and, of course, tobacco… even selling American Spirit.*

*Local Deli Trastevere. Cheeses, meats, pastas, olives and wine… what else do you need?*

Cafe Fantini, Rome — Cafe Fantini is just across the river from Trastevere in the Campo de Fiori area and serves up an excellent and typical “happy hour” or aperitivo buffet plus a glass of wine (several choices) for 8€. Popular with the afterwork professional crowd, its inside and street side tables are full but if you can find a spare stool you’re welcome to join others at their tables. Great, friendly, yummy, inexpensive community experience.

street in Trastevere, chalk art — *Our street in Trastevere with fabulous chalk art on a stairway leading to a small park.*

First Days in Rome

March 23, 2017 2 Comments Italy, Travel

Piazza Venezia, Rome — *Piazza Venezia in the heart of Rome*

From our apartment on Viale di Trastevere, the Number 8 tram (across the street) takes us to its end at Piazza Venezia in just 10 minutes, and we are in the heart of the Centro Historico.

The tram and bus systems are easy, especially with Google Maps (you can download an offline version to use if you don’t get a local Sim Card or use roaming). SEE BELOW FOR PHONE AND TRANSPORT CARD INFO.

While any guide book (like Rick Steves’ Rome and Lonely Planet Rome) gives detailed information, history and significance of each site, I am after the feeling, and am frequently overwhelmed.

A short walk and we come upon Chiesa di Gesú, the first Jesuit church to be built in Rome. The outside is plain but the inside a Baroque spectacle. Besides all the gold adornments, statuary, and paintings of heaven, hell, saints and such, the soaring ceiling is a complex masterpiece of trompe l’oeil… 3-D at its best, (and earliest… remember, perspective had only recently been discovered in the early Renaissance with the use of mirrors) convincing the viewer (er, faithful adherent) that you’re looking deeply into a vibrantly real scenes.

*Chiesa del Gesú – panel of America. Each of the continents are depicted. Note the indigenous regal woman killing what looks to be a bear.*

part of ceiling of Gesú Church in mirror — *part of ceiling of Gesú Church as seen in a long mirror.*

Then came the Pantheon, considered the most influential building in art history. From the back, it’s a big, round rough-brick exterior, but from the front, with its Greek-style portico, it is magnificent.

*The Pantheon from Piazza della Rotonda, continuously a gathering place for 2,000 years.*

As I walked beneath the portico (dating from Emperor Hadian, 120 A.D.) to enter the main temple, I was stopped… not by the crowds or surprisingly few security guards, but by a sense of its magnificence. A visceral “wow!” I stood at the doorway for a minute or more, unable to move, just sensing the age, perfect symmetry and extraordinary connection through time and space to the countless millions of famous and “regular” lives that had also stood in this awesome place.

Piazza Navona, Bernini, Baroque style. — Piazza Navona was once the site of a vast stadium and racetrack, now surrounded by Baroque buildings. The fountain (Fontana del Moro) was remodeled in 1653 by Gian Lorenzo Bernini, credited with creating the Baroque style.

Amid the crowds of tourists, busy Romans, the vast cadre of unemployed youth (I’m told there is a 40% unemployment rate) hanging out in the piazzas, especially in the evenings, I can still find for myself a sense of connection to the past that is both extraordinarily familiar and wildly unexpected. Ahh, Rome!

More soon, and please leave your comments and share this blog. Thanks!

Notes on Telephone and Transport

I went to the Vodaphone office and bought a Sim card and 4 months of service for 40€. I can’t say exactly how many calls and data it includes but I was assured it would be sufficient. WhatsApp (text messaging and audio calls) remains my Mexico cell phone number (essentially an ID) and is the way most popular means of communication all over Europe, as it is free. So, if you are traveling in Europe and have a smart phone, you should setup (and understand) WhatsApp beforehand. If you have a carrier contract, you can likely add on an international roaming package but be sure you understand the costs.

I bought a monthly pass (38€), based on the calendar month, at a Tobacco shop. It includes trams, buses and metro. However, due to the lack of government – I mean, really, Italians consider themselves without an official government at the moment – no one is enforcing using a ticket or pass on the trams or buses. I’m told you need one for the Metro, but individual tickets can be purchased for 1€ on site. With trams being so easy and fast, I’ve not yet figured out the buses or Metro, but Google map directions are invaluable in getting from point A to B.

The Worst Part of Travel

March 19, 2017 11 Comments Italy, Travel

… and why going to Rome is worth it even if Cancun Airport sucks

“The worst part about travel is the travel part.” So said my dear friend and travel writer, Judith Fein, as I blithely assumed that my extensive preparations for this trip from Mexico to Rome would be seamless. I insist my travels always are.

Spanish Steps, Rome — *Spanish Steps on a rare, gloriously warm and sunny day in mid-March. See more Rome photos below.*

I can report that I left San Miguel de Allende by BajioGoshuttle.com on time and arrived two days later precisely on time at Fiumicino (Leonardo Da Vinci) Airport to be met my Santa Fe pal, Richard Seager, whose dream it was to rent an apartment in Rome for a month and had invited me to accompany him. But, in between San Miguel and Rome, I was not spared aggravation.

Cancun. Can you say, “tourist trap?”

Cancun is this traveler’s nightmare. It is tourism run amok, exuding an arrogance that often accompanies success. While international tourists flock to high-rise all-inclusive resorts – which I consider “gulags,” safe from interaction with Mexicans and their deep cultural heritage; albeit sometimes accompanied with real poverty – those using the airport for any other purpose are left with no seating, no wi-fi and absurdly expensive taxis for transportation through a hideous commercial district to get to and from what is absurdly called an “airport hotel.”

A few miles and $15 later, I was deposited at the (Dis)Comfort Inn, the closest and cheapest hotel to the airport ($89 USD including tax) that I’d booked months before, thinking I’d spend my next day, before the overnight flight to Frankfurt and on to Rome, doing client work and relaxing in the sun.

The restaurant was closed at 9:30 p.m. as I stood in line to check-in with the single agent. Half an hour later I was in my room. Nice and clean like the chain hotel it is, but no wi-fi in the rooms, no pool, and no services. Stranded between a gas station and truck repair facility, the only food option was a Subway sandwich or Burger King, but at least a mini mart sold wine and I drank half a bottle and slept well.

The next day, having to check out of my room by 1:00 p.m., I was directed to an airless glassed-in cubicle where I could access wi-fi and do some work. I had until 8 p.m. before check-in for the Condor flight to Germany. The weather, windy and gray, at least did not taunt me with my fantasy of poolside tanning.

The Cancun Airport challenge: Could I ignore the crass tourism, the airport hawkers, the posh shopping mall through which travelers were force-herded before finding their boarding gates? Could I curb my judgments of the overly-tattooed and shabbily dressed sporting gaudy mariachi sombreros, the loud and obnoxious, the expensive nutrition-less slop called food, and my embarrassment of being part of this species? Could I remember I was on my way, my first visit, to the Eternal City?

Finally seated in the last row of a packed plane, grateful for an empty seat between myself and a dour fellow who ignored my greeting, I settled in to pass the 10 hours dosing and watching “From Rome With Love,” which I’d downloaded on my laptop, a new super-light MacBook that the brilliant Pinterest queen, Louise Cottrell, helped me set up before leaving Mexico.

Frankfurt Airport was a breeze – fast pass through EU immigration, good food and free wi-fi – and soon I arrived in Rome, was greeted by my friend, picked up my bag, walked through customs, met our driver and arrived at our apartment in Trastevere that was even better than the Airbnb description and photos.

The worst part of travel was over and, as is often said about childbirth, women forget the pain. I put mine behind me. It was another seamless joourney and the experience of Rome could begin.

Here are a few photos from our first marvelous day. Stay tuned for how I was frozen at the entrance to the Pantheon, the incredible 3-D trompe l’oile in Chiesa del Gesú, hanging out with Couchsurfers on a Friday night in Trastevere, my local vendors, new friends, Sunday at Porto Potense market and much more.

Have you been to Rome? Do you have recommendations or stories? Please share in the comments below.